Friday, May 16

Another Stoopid Tool

A Christianist on the lunatic fringe (this comparison is wholly unfair to most semi-rational members of the lunatic fringe) has decided that Starbuck's rehashed legacy logo above is obscene and that all right-thinking persons should shun Starbucks in favor of less-revealing coffee merchants. Now, I'm no big fan of Starbucks' coffee - it tastes burnt and bitter to me, likely a result of their massive demand on the world bean supply and an attempt to even out the supply with substandard, over-roasted blends. Whatever. 

By the way, I have decided not to link to this asswipe's site. Linking only bumps his Google ratings and gives him more power. You'll have to find him the hard way - "theresistancemanifesto" dot com.

What I don't understand is how this one guy, acting like a latter-day John Ashcroft, can decide that what offends his prurient, repressive peepee-brain, mainly breasts on a coffee cup, should offend the rest of us. My life doesn't revolve around boobs, but I'm not offended by them. Hell, I've got a pretty good man-rack myself. 

I have a theory:
I figger this San Diego dipshit has never actually seen boobs in real life and that the Starbucks Siren has him afraid that all women have scales and tailfins. I can extend this thinking to the supposition that he would also be offended by the big, chrome Dagmars on a '55 Cadillac. 
If you're younger than dirt, here is the real Dagmar, aka Virginia Egnor:

And here are her Harley Earl namesakes on a '55 Caddy:

Sweet God of Chrome, Protect Us!

Of course, Jesus gets invoked early on at doofus's site, along with 9/11 conspiracy theories, New World Order rants, Illuminati fears and all manner of thinking that most six-graders have long outgrown. Might have known. He'll probably be entirely surprised when someone clocks him into next week for making a loud public fuss about his imaginary friend's plans for all us mortal knuckle-draggers. I'd really like to be standing there with a cup of Starbucks coffee when it happens.

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